"Everyone of importance—the New York Times, MSNBC, NPR, the Huffington Post, Mother Jones, and Salon—agreed that there was no obvious motive. Time and again for many years attackers had come from nowhere and killed for no reason. There was no pattern except the strange cry, “Allahu Akbar.”
Mrs. Clinton’s Secretary of Defense, Wilhelmina “Creepy” Crawley, offered an explanation.
“My staff at the Pentagon have determined that “Akbar” is a
combination of “AK,” automatic Kalashnikov, which I am told is a form of
gun, and BAR, Browning Automatic Rifle. This shows an unwholesome
fascination with guns. We are investigating links to the NRA:”"